I'm Raising A Future Lawyer

While I was tucking Peanut in tonight, Bug asked to borrow my laptop because he just HAD TO type something up. When I returned, this is what greeted me:

I hereby by signing this contract vow that I will not yell at my sibling,except in dire straits, if I am under the age of twelve for if I do yell at my sibling I will be suspended from computer and laptop time for 3 hours,  play dates excluded. I also signify that by singing this contract that no words that have no definition in slang or otherwise may be used in a 10 foot radius of children under the age of 6, for they are most defenseless to bad influence.

signed  

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Somebody hold me. We're screwed.