Tuesday
Jan242012
Before And After Photos
Tuesday, January 24, 2012 at 5:36PM When I look through my pictures, I define them all in my head as before and after photos.
Before Bob died.

And after.

I wonder, like one wonders if she looks different after losing her virginity, if I look different to other people after Bob's death. Can they tell I'm a widow? Does it show in my face?
Before.

After.

The pictures of the kids, of the house, our pets, everything in our lives—they are all defined as before and after.
There is not a single photo that I see that I do not know where it falls on that continuum. I might not know the year, month, or place, but I do know where that one defining event lands in relationship to that picture. Always.
Before.
After.
filed in
Widow in the hood,
faux toes
Widow in the hood,
faux toes 


Reader Comments (3)
Boy, did you say it.
I'm convinced it's written all over my face in all the after shots.
There's a picture a friend took of me and another friend at the memorial service and though I'm smiling I look absolutely wasted. Just wrecked. The sadness and shock radiates off me even in a still picture.
I swear I can see oblivious naivety in my eyes in the before shots.
Fortunately, the after shots also show a little more steely determination, independence and wisdom, I think.
I'm exactly the same way. With pictures and with events (a movie came out in 2004? Before. A book came out in 2006? After.)
Either way, you're gorgeous before and after.
I've had this tab open since last night when I first read this. I was hoping the right words would come, but I'm not sure they ever will. I guess it will always be before and after, but in your after? You really are rocking it. xo