Subscribe to Califmom via Email

Elsewhere

Five Star Friday

Affiliations
Nuts & Bolts

« I'M BOOOOOOORRRRRRED | BTW, He's Dead »
Tuesday
Jan242012

Before And After Photos

When I look through my pictures, I define them all in my head as before and after photos.

Before Bob died.

IMG 2458

And after.

IMG 2267

I wonder, like one wonders if she looks different after losing her virginity, if I look different to other people after Bob's death. Can they tell I'm a widow? Does it show in my face?

Before.

2446342604 70ddfacc43 o

After.

DSC 0427 3

The pictures of the kids, of the house, our pets, everything in our lives—they are all defined as before and after.

There is not a single photo that I see that I do not know where it falls on that continuum. I might not know the year, month, or place, but I do know where that one defining event lands in relationship to that picture. Always.

Before.

After.

 

Reader Comments (3)

Boy, did you say it.
I'm convinced it's written all over my face in all the after shots.
There's a picture a friend took of me and another friend at the memorial service and though I'm smiling I look absolutely wasted. Just wrecked. The sadness and shock radiates off me even in a still picture.
I swear I can see oblivious naivety in my eyes in the before shots.
Fortunately, the after shots also show a little more steely determination, independence and wisdom, I think.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCassie

I'm exactly the same way. With pictures and with events (a movie came out in 2004? Before. A book came out in 2006? After.)

Either way, you're gorgeous before and after.

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSherry Carr-Smith

I've had this tab open since last night when I first read this. I was hoping the right words would come, but I'm not sure they ever will. I guess it will always be before and after, but in your after? You really are rocking it. xo

January 25, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterpgoodness

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.

My response is on my own website »
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>